lately: my heart.

 i stumbled across this song one night when it was just what i needed, and i've been listening to it on repeat, and thinking through the lyrics since then.  with un finished wedding plans, school pressing in on me in all of my weakest spots, and a summer full of unknowns, I've found myself, well... not being myself.  sure, i've always been a worrier.  i was the friend that always said "what if we get in trouble?" or "i don't think our parents would be happy..."  i always analyze, make lists, but recently i've found myself almost paralyzed by the decisions in front of me.  with all of these up-coming decisions, i've been gripped by my anxiety.  my chest hurts, my stomach threatens to return my lunch, and all i want to do is curl up and go back to bed where no decisions need to be made. or just cry.  that usually happens too.  i've been trying to handle all of this messy life stuff on my own, and frankly it's just. not. working.  i selfishly pushed God out of my everyday tasks and decisions thinking "i can totally handle this" and "God doesn't care what color my table linens are at my wedding reception."  well i (clearly) can't handle it on my own. God might not exactly care about my color choices, but he does care for me.  while all of these decisions are mine to make, i do have a God who cares for me and wants the best for me. he wants to steady my heart, if only i learn to trust that he is in control. 


soaking up the sun

well.... i've been a little behind the 8 ball with wedding plans lately... thank you, nursing school.  
finally, we found a weekend to meet up with our wedding photographer to do a little engagement session :)  it was a gorgeous winter day in annapolis, and the only day with sun in about a week.  we were so blessed with the weather!  here are some of my favorites: 
photo dump anyone??

 (the 16 is because our wedding is on the 16th. har har)

thank you, Kyle for capturing these photos :) 

happy weekend, lovelies! 


friday letters.

hey guys!  so i've been in a major blogging funk (have i ever not been in one, is the real question , i think) and i'm gonna try some link-ups through out the week, maybe to hold me accountable?  and to hang out with some other lovely blogging ladies :)
so... here goes nothin!

dear fiance: yesterday we sat together in silence doing work in starbucks, yet somehow i loved the time we had together.  stealing glances at your handsome self intently writing e-mails made my heart flutter and made studying cardiac disorders not so terrifying.  dear weather: please, please warm up!!  or at least stop being windy.  I really hate the wind.  (but you already know that)  dear  mom:  have a great weekend away with your crazy girlfriends!  so glad you can get away and stop working every once in a while.  dear wedding:  I CANT WAIT FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm linking up with ashley over at the sweet season  she's so sweet, and preganant, and has the cutest little pup.